Lifeletter #183: Praise Often

Awake, my dear.
Be kind to your sleeping heart.
Take it out into the vast fields of Light
And let it breathe.
-Hafiz

I worked recently with a Zen teacher named Diane Musho Hamilton. One of the guidelines she asked us to follow in our group process was ‘Praise Often.‘ The more I practice this, the more I learn about praise and the unfathomable nature of the heart.

Praise is not flattery, praise is not casual. Real praise is precise, and it comes from the fact that I see you, I hear you, I feel you. Praise is not “Oh you are so amazing,” or “You have such great qualities, I wish I could be more like you.”

Authentic praise is like medicine, for the one who offers it, and for the one who receives. It sounds more like this:

“When you dared to speak up for yourself the other day, I felt your courage. It touched me in my heart and made it quiver.”

Or like this: “When I am with you, I feel your commitment to meditation, no matter how difficult it is for you. I am realizing that if you can do this, then I can do it too. Thank you for showing me this is possible.”

Or like this: “I saw you listen to Tom and take in what he said, without defending yourself. Something happened to me when I felt your openness, your willingness to listen. This way of being feels so precious to me.”

Sometimes praise is just a look, a gesture, a glance of recognition, a deep breath in, so I can really feel the beauty and potency of who you are.

If praise is really a kind of medicine, deep nourishment flowing from a loving and brilliant source, why do we not pour it freely into the hearts and minds and souls of the people around us? Good question!

Take up the practice and find out. Discover what is is that is holding you back from the light and  warmth and live-giving sweetness of praise. Feel what happens when you open your heart to the depths of praise, to really seeing the magnificence, the beauty beyond what you already know, in the person before you.

The more praise flows through you, the more you will be able to receive. Real praise doesn’t leave you as you are. It transforms the ones who offer and the ones who can receive. It awakens us, carries us far beyond the world of the fault-finding mind, the mind that always has a problem to solve. Praise invites us to open, to rest, to breathe again.

 

Awake awhile.
It does not have to be forever…
Awake awhile.
Just one True moment of Love will last for days.
-Hafiz

 

with love,
Shayla