Lifeletter #182: Safety, Eros & Our Creative Power
“I want to be more creative,” a woman said to me the other day. “I’ve been feeling this desire for a long time. I need some help with this.” A man I was working with told me, “I feel that my creative energy is shut down. I want to open this channel, and I don’t really know how. Sometimes I feel ashamed, that I can’t express myself more freely. I don’t know why this feels so important.” This longing for contact with our core creativity...
Read MoreLifeletter #181: Erotic Intelligence
Over many years of working with couples, I discovered a very interesting thing. During the course of their relationship, many of them lost touch with their erotic intelligence. The flame of their sexual intimacy died down, became a tiny flicker, or just went out. In the ashes of that fire, they tried to maintain a sense of real connection, and it didn’t really work. “We are friends, really good friends,” some of them would tell me. Underneath those words I would hear something...
Read MoreLifeletter #180: Your Unprecedented Life
You, who are reading these words, right now, you have never been here before. Not ever. Do you know this? Can you feel the truth of this in your heart, in your body? Forget about past lives-even if you’ve had millions of them, you have never been here before, in this body-mind, with this particular DNA. Your life, as the Buddhist teacher Reggie Ray puts it, is unprecedented. Unprecedented is defined as “unknown, new, novel, groundbreaking, revolutionary, pioneering, epoch-making.”...
Read MoreLifeletter # 179: A New and Radical Possibility
We can actually learn, if we are willing, to hold this energy and the feelings, as they emerge in ourselves and in others. This is a new and radical possibility. I’m not sure that is has ever happened before.
Read MoreLifeletter #178: To Be Seen or Not To Be Seen (This is the question)
I feel that a deeper transparency would go a long way toward healing and liberating the ancient patterns that we are up against in our closest relationships. The fights we have behind closed doors, the anger we feel and do not want to admit to, the estrangements, the regrets, the grief, the shame-all of these things follow us around, no matter how successful we may be in the other world. And eventually the weight of what has not been acknowledged, integrated and included takes a heavy toll on us.
Read MoreLifeletter #177: The Queen of F-ing Everything
A very beautiful woman, a precious member of the Nelson community named Fiona Mooney, passed away while I was visiting the Kootenays last week. Her beloved partner mentioned in an email after she died that she had a favourite mug on which was written ‘Queen of Fucking Everything.’ I felt a visceral connection with Fiona’s spirit when I heard that. I also felt, and so did some of my friends, that I wanted a mug just like that. I got very curious about this. What is it that is...
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